Leeds University: Slide to success

Six out of every seven people who apply for Leeds University get turned away. This is a fact (or as close to as i can remember), so why is it that so many people want to come here? Is it because in its 104 years of existance it has established itself a worldwide reputation for excellence in a wide range of academic disiplines, because it is in the top ten Universities for research in the UK, has over 50 000 people enrolled in its courses, or because people want to follow in the great J.R.R Tolken's foot steps and be a student at this outstanding institution? The answer is neither of these (although 'did Tolken study there?' is a good way of cutting back Universities to choose from) but is infact that Leeds must have the best handrails for sliding on anywhere in the world. Right now for instance, I am already looking forward to walking back to my residence, as i will be walking thirty metres less then i walked here. Thats right there are three hand rails adding up to a whopping thirty metres for free, energy efficient, exhilerating transportation. Leeds has not got this reputation as a handrail sliders paradise because of the number and length of available handrails, but of their variety. This enables the avid student to experience all types of rail helping them to study and appreciate this fine art. There are two main variables that you have with a free standing rail - gradient and surface. If the pole is painted you will only slide on it if you are wearing business type trousers (i choose a grey pair as it doesn't show up any stains that you may get from the rail), but if it is untreated steel or aluminium ('untouched' in rail sliders jargon)you will slide with greater speed and can get away with wearing regular jeans. Gradient varies alot here at Leeds too, as the Uni is built on the slight incline of a hill, meaning that there is a good range to test your skills. I'm a big fan of the two short sharp untouched rails at the back of the union building, but my favourite are the triple, low-gradient painted ones leading off the Bragg building cluster where i am now - not great speed, but enough length to enjoy the ride and really test your balance.
If you want to improve the skills that will get you further, faster in life, then Leeds is for you, while your here why not try getting a degree as well!