I was playing football (soccer) recently with some English pals, and there was this one bloke on the other team who was your typical soccer player - Speedy haircut, Man U shirt, shiny boots, and in all fairness he had quite good ball skills and had made me look pretty average everytime i tried to get past him. So i made it my mission to beat him, and i did! He had the ball, i slide in, got it off him, hit him in the knee with my knee, he fell down, screamed in alot of pain and sat off for the next ten minutes. It was a bit of a hollow victory...
Not being a drinker i don't go out to bars much, but on Monday i went to The Library (a bar) with some people from Charlie Mo as a 'cheerio' for Steve the American. It was nice, i talked to many people and the music wasn't too loud. The highlight of the night though? Some golden English lingo...
"So Josh, how was your exam?"
"I thought it was a peach actually"
Brilliant.
Conundrums. We all come accross them everynow and again, and i had one just yesterday that was a real humdinger. I was walking around the back of the Union building and came accross two of my favourite handrails to slide down - short, sharp and untouched. But they were both covered in beads of water from the recent downpour. I was five paces out when I noticed this and knew that if I rode the rails I would then have to sport a wet mark that started at the back of my crotch and ran down my left leg, giving the impression i had suffered a rather nasty rectal failure. Yet at the same time I knew that the water on the rail would add as a lubricant, making the slide even faster. Conundrum indeed. With half a pace to go i decided to do what any extreme rail rider would and take the ride. I proudly wore my damp pants, and saw the mark on them not as a stain of seepage shame, but as a badge of honour for attempting that which other might flinch at.
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